Tribute to Chan Fat Ho

Mum was born in 1930 in a village in Dongguan. Back then, Dongguan had nothing but agricultural fields and few built-up areas. She grew up with an elder brother and an elder sister. Mum was traumatised by the Second World War. From time to time, she would recall her attempts to keep up with her father running for safety from air raids.

Mum married Dad through an arranged marriage at the age of 19. Marrying into an unknown family must be stressful for a young woman. Luckily, Dad treated Mum well. But that was never guaranteed in an arranged marriage.

In the 1950s and 1960s, Mum lived in Stone Nullah Lane in Wan Chai, where she gave birth to five children. Together with her mother-in-law's seven children, the family of sixteen squeezed into a flat below 300 square feet.

Without modern conveniences such as washing machines, Mum had to deal with household chores from morning to night. Yet, she found time to take her children to Happy Valley or Victoria Park on Saturdays. Such family time was very important to their upbringing. One by one, she even had time to take her children to school admission tests and prepare them with lunch boxes. How many hours did she have per day?

In the 1960s, the family moved to the Ngau Tau Kok Estate. It was a rather inconvenient part of Hong Kong. Coping with the new environment was certainly challenging. In exchange, Mum got more space and freedom. In Ngau Tau Kok, Mum gave birth to her sixth child. We struggled financially. Mum had to take up all sorts of handicraft jobs to increase our income. Sewing vamps paid well. So Mum learned the required skills and invested in a sewing machine with a big motor.

Though financially stretched, Mum never hesitated to help relatives who were in greater need. While those she helped were grateful, few could imagine how much sacrifices Mum had to make to find those resources.

By the 1970s and 1980s, as her children grew up, the family's financial situation improved. In the early 1990s, Dad and Mum could begin to relax and enjoy life. Unfortunately, Dad passed away in 1997. After a period of devastation, Mum joined the local community centre. There she learned many new things. Apart from English, she learned two new games, which enriched her life.

Mum learned fast in the game of pool. Unorthodox though her techniques were, she could often pot sequences of balls. She was also tactical: she would tactically leave certain balls on the table. She was probably one of the best pool players in their 80s.

In the last decade, Mum was fascinated by the game Rummikub. She played it every day. In fact, on the day before she died, she still enjoyed watching us play; she even attempted to suggest moves. A month before her death, she was still able to make complicated moves that her children missed. She must be one of the top, top Rummikub players in their 90s.

On 1st June 2024, Mum was baptized and embraced Christianity. Her faith was evident as she started looking more relaxed. She told us that she was in God's hands. She often made prayer gestures when she struggled to speak.

Reflecting on Mum's life, from a village girl with very little formal education, she established herself as an educated sharp woman. Having selflessly brought up six children and helped others through financial difficulties, she enjoyed the fruit of her endeavour. She's brought up her children to love each other. Having found her faith, she died in peace.

Although passing is sorrowful, Mum has been fortunate: her suffering was relatively brief. Her children, daughters-in-law, sons-in-law, grandchildren and great-grandchildren visited her frequently in her final year. She enjoyed the company of her six children in her final month. She passed away peacefully. Having her wish to be buried alongside her husband granted, Mum has completed a rich and fulfilling life.

Though Mum is no longer with us, she is living in each of our lives...

By Children of Chan Fat Ho